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An Illusion of Fear

By Joyce Sobotta


Before we learn how to deal with fear, we first need to understand what it is. There are two distinct kinds of fear. Natural fear and perceived, or false, fear. It is important to differentiate what kind of fear we are dealing with. False fear has been described as “false expectations appearing real.” Fear is an expectation of what might happen in the future, but, it might not. It puts us in a survival mode when no present problem exists. We act out of the influence of the media and others.  


When we believe in an illusion, or false fear, we give our power away. Most of the things a person worries about never happen. It has been said that 85 percent of the things we worry about never happen, and the things that do, we cannot control anyway. There are several techniques that may help toward eliminating fears:


  • Breathe deeply, hold, exhale, and hold again. Repeat several times. 

  • Use quality essential oils every day to calm the body and spirit

  • Add homeopathy to calm the mind

  • Pray and mediate    


Fear causes chronic stress. Getting tied in knots about what might happen in the near future, which we cannot change, adds more stress to our body. If we already have a health condition, this stress makes it worse. Dealing with fear is the same as dealing with any other emotion. It begins with taking time to be aware of what we are feeling. Then ask if it is real or not. What is the worst thing that can happen?    


Love and fear are the only two true emotions.  Love expands our heart and connects us to others; fear contracts our heart and separates us from others. Every action we take in life is either out of love or out of fear. It has been said that all fear is a variation of the fear of death. Few of us contemplate this concept fully and, instead, tend to ignore the reality of death, because it frightens us. Those in touch with the ultimate reality of death consider it to be a graduation of the soul or spirit. 


Spiritual Beings Having a Human Experience


Having a friendly relationship with death is a birthright for each of us if we are willing to do the work. And the work is dealing with our fears about the subject. No other culture is as disconnected with death as ours. Conventional medicine looks at death as the enemy, something to be conquered at all costs. 


We are so identified with material forms that the thought of losing these forms causes great fear. Death does not mean we become nothing. You have heard it said that we are spiritual beings having a human experience. That is true. Our spirit, or soul, keeps on living in another dimension.  


We can compare our existence to an ocean wave. It has a beginning and an end, but it is always water. When the wave ceases to exist, the water that made it is still somewhere. Each wave has a birth and death, but the essence of the wave (the water) never ceases to exist. 

                                                                                                                                                                                                          On a cellular level we are dying and being reborn all the time. Every cell in our body is preprogramed for a certain lifespan and differs from other cell types. This preprogramed cell death is called apoptosis … the process of cell death and rebirth is going on all the time. 


Many anxieties, worry and fears are associated with death and dying. You’ve probably heard stories of people who have died and come back after being in a coma, and they tell us they didn’t want to come back into their physical body because it was so beautiful where their spirit had gone for a while. When we can accept the inevitable, that we all are going to die sometime, we can live each day to the fullest with gratitude, joy, and happiness, and have no regrets at the end.     


Life and death are intertwining throughout nature. If you look around a healthy forest, you will see dead and dying trees. You will also see a rotten log with flowers and young saplings growing out of it. Death literally is a breeding ground for new life. 


Fear of dying is a symptom of our forgetfulness more than anything else. In our journey through this material realm, we have forgotten who we really are. There is more to come after we leave our physical body. Even though they differ in what they believe life after physical death looks like, every religion references an afterlife.  

Take Away the Illusion of Fear


Here’s how we can bring balance and understanding to what death really is:  


  • Understand that our time in mortality is limited, so make every minute of every day important for yourself, family, and friends. 

  • Focus on what is most important in life.

  • Be grateful for all that we are and all that we have and express it with happiness and joy.  


Acceptance, sometimes referred to as surrender, is often expressed as “Let go and let God.” It means there is a reason for this struggle that is not yet visible to us. When we can accept how things are in the present moment, we are brought into alignment with a higher power – God. 

It is the reality of life that best teaches us how to live. Ask any soldier what life is like during war. Aside from the fear and horror of combat, he or she will usually describe an intense sense of aliveness. Because soldiers know each day could be their last. The rest of us live under the illusion that tomorrow is promised to us. It isn’t. 

Let us take an example from Marianne Williamson who so eloquently states,” As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” 

Joyce Sobotta is the founder/owner of Healthy Girls Breast Oil, an essential oil blend created for breast health. She teaches the importance of the lymphatic system and how to use pure essential oils to detox, balance and stimulate the immune system. Sobotta has a BS degree in education, certifications in aromatherapy and reflexology. She is available for presentations, consultations, custom blends, and DIY essential oil classes. To learn more visit